Monday, August 3, 2015

today: the final radiation date, and this lightness of healing

today: the first monday of august
today: driving that road to the hospital for the 40th time, smiling with this light feeling of happiness
today: wearing my yellow radioactive t-shirt
today: trying a reflection photo that didn't really work...

but i post it anyway, for that yellow moment
today: my final radiation date, which was same like the ones before, and so different.
today: finally pulling away the medical radiation marker plasters under the shower
today: time to start healing for good.

The nature photo above is from yesterday - it was a beautiful sunny day, and i felt like driving up to the Alb plateau. Haven't been there for a while. There's a summer sculpture walk now, and i enjoyed the stroll through the landscape and the art, along the open horizon. a good place to reflect, and think about time, about the weeks past, and the time ahead:

For me, august will be about recovering and healing. Finally, finally, just healing, and not getting-well-enough-to-be-okay-for-the-next-treatment.

It felt symbolic, to walk there, towards the wider view.

Another tiny symbolic moment: today i received an invite for the frankfurt book fair 2015. the fair, it feels like a time marker: the day at the frankfurt book fair 2014 was the last day of ease and taking-health-for-granted for me. one day later, back home, i found the lump in my breast. that day is like a divide: the time before, the time after.

now, into this new days..  into the lightness of healing. and so lovely that summer is coming with blue skies right now.


previous, longer blog post with links:
radiation countdown + hairy identity matters + shadowlight


Cathrine said...

And so it is :-)
Wishing you light days now for decades to come

Jk Davies said...

The headline photo is of lightness and relief, and I wish you both as you continue through this long journey of life and bookfairs! x

Dorothee said...

Thanks for your lovely wishes!
it still feels a bit unreal to really have reached this place after all the treatments. like walking through a light door.